L.O.S.E.R

“Do you mind I’m a smoker?”

Was looking somewhere else and didn’t care so much for that moment…and reply,

“Why? It’s nothing lah ! I was grown in a smoking environment also.

My dad, my bro, my sis, uncle-uncle around me included my ah mah also smoke mah, nvm lah.”

I know. I was wronged at first.

Trying to act like Nana,wtf…feeling very unique to answer that? Feeling cool I’m different with other gals…shit!

Damn it, I regret now!

I should have say
“WHAT?! You’re smoking kaki? You better fuck off and eat with yourself.”

Aiya !!!!!!!!!!

What use to bring this back now?!

Hmm…

To be frank,

I’m not really concern about smoking so much actually…because he said he will quit it once he got marriage.

I’m not perasanted to think that he will marry me then I can witness he quit smoking.

But, at least,

He will quit it one day. I believe he can do it.

But now …haih…

Lotsa lotsa timesand lotsa things he refused to listen to me.

I did all that for his own good

But …

He just won’t understand,

He looks so weak now…

Every time I feel pain when I saw he’s suffering…it’s like a razor stabbing my heart…

Nothing I can do, but

cry

I feel I’m a loser that cant take good care of him,

I feel bad that I cant have some of his pain,

I feel sad to see he takes the pain by himself and nothing I can do for him…

I really feel tired…

Dear, would you listen to me?

Pls pls pls dun hurt yourself anymore ok?

You are loved, by me, by your family, pls don’t ever think pessimistically

God, if you hear me,

Please cure him, or transfer his pain to me if possible.

Never want to see him like that…

Sinful morn

I had a weird dream last night.

I dreamt of him.

Is it because his PM gave me lotsa impactful thoughts?

I wonder why…

I would have such a dream.

In that dream, the way he looks at me are totally different like usual.

No one knows what’s going on to both of us.

Only we know what is going on.

Perhaps, this dream will come true in the future?

Because I didn’t mention it to anyone?

I do hope anything happen to us somehow.

But greed dashes in my heart in and out; I wish I could have both of cheese cake and chocolate fudge.

Yah, I’m that kinda woman indeed.

Sinful morn on Monday …

Y2J i love eu~~~

Went to Y2J & EvanYo Digi Music Unlimited Live Concert yesterday.

It was really enjoyable and it's worth to sweat and Q all the way from 3.30pm.

P.s : the live concert start from 8.15pm...

Gosh cant imagine i actually waited for sooo damn long just to listen to your voice.

Y2J ah Y2J, i did all these oni for you lil chubby yuming and wild cat huang mei zhen o !

I love live band, and live concert! i duno why , i just lovin it ! ^^

and i'm in love in LIVE crazily..

everything regarding to L.I.V.E, i just can diggin in..haha...

i love LIVE badminton, live band, Live sex, live mourning..OPps..its a U channel.wahaha..

i was too excited lah.

their new song " 守护者" really nice! i cant stop playing it from my Homepage in FB.

although it is in a youtube, the sound quality is not so good, but i just keep repeating it over and over..

ahh~ nice song ! good job shen mu ! ^^

Btw, i'm goin to Genting with Lunzi and fellows GD4 mates tml.

feel high? nope..but drooling...

wahaha... as we are all well planned to have lunch buffet in Coffee Terrace.

wahaha...its been years i din step into that freaking expensive place.

but....since now having the lunch buffet in Coffee Terrace, then i shall gorge up all the food there ! hmph!

tml we depart from KL sentral at 10am like that, but meet up time is 9.15am..need to sleep now lu~

good nite everyone ！^^

The end of Year 2 Semester 2

it has come to an end again..i realize that i oni post a new achieve when my sem is goin to end. LOL...

am i that busy to post a blog? yea, i was. haha...now i'm still busy...

busy to relax, busy to plan where to go ,

busy thinking of where to club,

where to hang out,

who to go with,

what shall i do during sem break,

going back muar? or shall i just stay here?

ahh....i love sem breaks ! so many tiny lil thing that i would love and glad to bother.sweet troubles !!! wuhoo! sem break bonsai !

Year 2 Sem 2

19.10.2009

Today is my 1st day to college for this semester.

Same route to college,

same faces in college,

same jokes ( about chun hooi and kar yeng)

Shir just came back from Taiwan with Gac, Burger and their fella frens.

she bought ' metal egg' for me..haha....i love it !

and she shared the pics with us while the long boring intervals of next class.

they had so much fun at taiwan, and lotsa jokes to share with us to !

i'm gonna have a family trip to overseas too, but for now still destination unknown as there're some problems occur during the discussion. well, i do hope i can join em too, but the stupid utar dun have the 2010 academic calendar and they dono next sem's period. ok, fine, i'll just do it and dun care about it.dun fk care the exams! yeah! this is what i have learnt from my sis.she want me to do that for her sake ! ok , just go go go, big deal !

What a tiring semester !

Ahh~~finally..this sem has come to an end..a costly and heartburn ending..(coz the printing fees cost me alot!) i feel so happy but yet tired now. The assignment load is slightly heavier than previous semester and i have exploded my emo feeling and bad temper few times. sorry for my team mates..paiseh loh. Now left the Desktop Publishing's final presentation oni,so..consider quite free ady...hmm....thinking to work as a part timer at jaya 1 's Kinnaree Thai restaurant, but feel like want to rest a while after this whole long sem..dilemma-ing...how?how?well,talk about this later. today i saw my classmates portfolio when they submit,wah...those works are so beautiful if rili compare to mine..sob...T.T....feeling grey and down now,they killed all my confidence.i feel i'm a loser now....sigh...how can i get back my confidence???

Well,i'm neither the one on left nor right. But i'm in this lady's stomach after 13 years.

I just ended my blog in Wretch and plan to start a new life here.

I hope my english can improve by blogging.(previous 1 was all using chinese)

I'm Kiwi,21

currently studying in UTAR,Defree in Graphic Design and Multimedia

i love music,all sorts of music.

i love my family for sure.

i love to eat,that's why i'm not slim for over 10 years.haha

ok,that's all for today.